1. We’ve definitely compared ourselves to your ex.
2. We’ve also secretly kept up with what our ex is up to via social media.
3. We’ve totally bought something and hidden it from you.
4. We’ve pretended to like a horrible gift you got us because, marriage.
5. We’ve pretended to like that friend, family member, or co-worker of yours that we can’t fucking stand.
6. And from time to time, we’ve used your razor to shave our legs.
7. We’ve bought snacks and hidden them from you.
8. We’ve asked for your opinion between two outfits even though we already picked the one we want in our head.
9. We’ve taken casual glances at your texts, emails, or social media accounts and maybe made a few adjustments.
10. We’ve broke, lost, or damaged something of yours and blamed it on someone or something else.
we’ve totally gushed about you more. Because you’re really the best husband ever.
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